Posted 5 years ago
For most people, negotiating can cause anxiety and be uncomfortable to deal with. The negotiation table can leave some people feeling like they lost a battle or got the short end of the stick. This week, Dr. Tony Alessandra gives us tips on how to treat negotiations as a collaborative effort. With these tips, we can learn how to make negotiations a “win-win” situation and solve problems together.
Collaborative Negotiating Strategies
by Dr. Tony Alessandra
I believe there are two ways to negotiate: manipulatively and collaboratively. You could call it “win‑win” versus “win‑lose.”
Manipulative negotiating sees the participants as adversaries. Tactics include exerting power, using subterfuge and hiding your own nonverbal communications. There is a lot of mistrust, tension, and suspicion. The manipulative negotiator’s goal is to win. There are usually hard feelings on somebody’s part–typically the loser. The focus is on single answers and positions – “This is what I want!” It’s hardball negotiating. If you are making a one-time negotiation and you’re not going to see the people anymore, perhaps you can get away with it, but it’s not a healthy business practice.
The collaborative negotiator sees the participants as problem solvers looking for a mutually satisfactory solution. It’s a process that both parties can walk away from and feel comfortable that neither one was “had.” It relies on trust, openness, credibility and honesty. The goal is a wise and fair outcome for all parties. The focus is on multiple options. There are many ways to satisfy both parties’ needs, not just one.
Everybody should have a negotiating philosophy. Many people enter important negotiations without having a clear idea of what they would like to accomplish. A negotiating philosophy could be that you want to go for low price; or you may be willing to pay going rates, but you want to get as many additional amenities as possible. Here’s my personal negotiating philosophy: “When two people want to do business with each other, they will not let the details stand in the way. However, when two people do not want to do business with each other, the details will rarely pull the deal together.” If somebody wants to do business with you he is more apt to compromise and less apt to seek unreasonable compromises from you.
Here are several specific actions you can take during Collaborative Negotiating.
By following the above strategies, you should significantly improve the outcomes you generate from your negotiations. Furthermore, your counterparts in the negotiation sessions will feel much better about you, the process, and the outcomes. Together you’ll both feel that a “fair” position was reached that was in the best interest of both sides ‑‑ a “win‑win” outcome. That’s the bottom line benefit of Collaborative Negotiating!
Dr. Tony Alessandra has a street-wise, college-smart perspective on business, having been raised in the housing projects of NYC to eventually realizing success as a graduate professor of marketing, internet entrepreneur, business author, and hall-of-fame keynote speaker. He earned a BBA from Notre Dame, a MBA from the Univ. of Connecticut and his PhD in marketing from Georgia State University (1976).
Known as “Dr. Tony” he’s authored 30+ books and 100+ audio/video programs. He was inducted into the NSA Speakers Hall of Fame (1985) and Top Sales World’s Hall of Fame (2010). Meetings & Conventions Magazine has called him “one of America’s most electrifying speakers”.
Dr. Tony is also the Founder/CVO of Assessments 24×7. Assessments 24×7 is a global leader of online DISC assessments, delivered from easy-to-use online accounts popular with business coaches and Fortune 500 trainers around the world. Interested in learning more about these customized assessment accounts? Please contact us.